


XOXO, Merlin

by a_wee_nonny_mouse (annewed)



Series: XOXO [1]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - BDSM, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, BDSM Scene, Bottom Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Established Relationship, Heavy BDSM, Life Partners, M/M, Top Merlin (Merlin), Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-22 15:31:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22718242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annewed/pseuds/a_wee_nonny_mouse
Summary: Distracted by trouble at work and with a conflict of schedules, it's been ages since Arthur has had a chance to see Merlin awake for more than just passing through.  As his frustration grows, he knows there is only one thing that can distract him from his concerns.  Fortunately, Merlin has a Valentine's Day surprise for his partner...
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Series: XOXO [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1633732
Comments: 9
Kudos: 154





	XOXO, Merlin

~XOXO~

Arthur was deep into the spreadsheet before him, struggling to pinpoint why the damned formula was not returning the correct value, tension spreading from his neck down his shoulders and up his head to lodge behind his eyes. He was increasingly conscious of the fact that the issue mightn’t be in the formula at all, that the values were correct and if that was the case… well. It wasn’t. It was simply that he couldn’t find the error, because otherwise, the numbers were too far off to be anything but deliberate. Again and again, he pivoted out the figures, ran calculations, pulled prior year projections, and all the while, the tension grew, the headache throbbed, and his stomach clenched. There was a knock on the door, jerking Arthur from his fugue and making him jump, which resulted in his elbow hitting the now cold half-full cup of coffee he’d brought with him after Guinevere had forced him out of the office for lunch. In slow motion, Arthur watched the cup tip, the lid fly off, and a deluge of milky coffee pour down the side of his desk and drip onto the floor.

“ _GOD DAMN IT!_ ” he roared, his frustration over spilled coffee secondary to his frustration with this twice damned, godforsaken spreadsheet, but both finding vent in this moment.

A curly head peered around the cracked door. “Arthur, everything all right?”

“NO,” he yelled at his poor assistant. “Everything is _NOT_ all right, everything is a fucking disaster. There is now coffee all over the place, I can’t find the error and I’m beyond frustrated right now. I’m beginning to think there may not be an error, and fucking _HELL_ , Gwen. I’m tearing my goddamned hair out.”

“Right, ok, I’ll be right back,” came the patient response and Arthur felt a burst of shame for allowing himself to speak to Gwen in such a way. She was the most efficient, patient, kind executive assistant he’d ever had, and certainly didn’t warrant any flare of temper from him because she knocked on the door and startled him at an inopportune moment. He took a deep breath, and realized at that moment that there was another source of tension and frustration crawling under his skin, making him want to lash out at others – he hadn’t seen Merlin in almost two weeks, between his late nights, and Merlin’s trip home and shifting schedule. No wonder he wasn’t able to focus as he might like. Even so, this would not improve until he could find the error, calculate the formulas correctly and finally figure out why the research development department overseen by his uncle Agravaine was losing money so dramatically.

Guinevere returned, towel in one hand, and cleaning wipes in another, and proceeded to blot the coffee and wipe up the mess while Arthur morosely sat and watched her, before penitently apologizing for his temper.

Gwen laughed. “Arthur, your temper is understandably frayed. I didn’t take your outburst personally, as it was clearly not directed at me.”

“Right, thank you, Guinevere. I appreciate your charity. And your cleaning skills. What is it you needed?”

“Two things. First, Merlin called me and asked me to tell you to turn your phone on. Apparently he’s been trying to get hold of you this afternoon.” Arthur cursed under his breath and fumbled for his phone, which was buried under a pile of printouts covered in figures. “And second, I’m on my way out, and wanted to see if you need anything before I go.”

“You’re leaving early?” Arthur asked in surprise. It wasn’t that his assistant didn’t deserve to take an afternoon here or there, he urged her to do often because she so frequently worked late beside him. It’s just that it was unusual for her to do so. 

She gave a laughing huff. “Do you know what today is?”

He looked blankly at her. “Uhm. Friday?”

“Friday, yes. February the . . .”

“Fourteenth? But – oh. Of course. Stupid of me. It’s Valentine’s Day. You told me that you had plans with Lance. Right, sorry. Yes, go, please go. Enjoy your evening. Come in late tomorrow. Or don’t come in at all!” Arthur realized he was babbling, and it was ridiculous because that is the sort of thing Gwen did when she was nervous, when had he picked up that habit of hers? He was the damned head of one of the largest biomedical research companies in the entire country, what on earth did he need to be babbling about?

A smile played over Guinevere’s face, and she brushed the curly hair that had escaped from her bun out of her face, clearly amused. “Yes, well, we’ll see about that, shall we? I know this has been driving you mad, but maybe you should try and leave it for the night? It might become clearer in the morning.”

Arthur grunted noncommittally, and turned his phone back on. “Merlin’s been working night shifts since he got back from visiting his mum. Traded shifts with Leon to free up the time. We don’t have any plans that I’m aware of.”

“Well, Happy Valentine’s Day, all the same. Tell Merlin hello for me.” Gwen retreated towards the door.

“Give Lance my best.” Arthur waved her on and looked at his messages. He noted missed calls and a text from his partner.

“Arthur, come home by 8:00. Dinner will be waiting. My night is free. XOXO, M”

A rush of anticipation, gratitude, lust and love welled through him. It had been far too long since he and Merlin had indulged in one another, and Arthur found that though the tension remained, his interest in resolving the issues immediately faded with the promise of Merlin’s hugs and kisses.

~XOXO~

Arthur didn’t make it home by eight o’clock after all. He was twenty-three minutes late, having spontaneously decided to buy flowers on his way. It was a holiday for lovers, after all, and while he didn’t personally care for silly greeting-card-run celebrations, Merlin always appreciated touches of romance and love. Spontaneously deciding to buy flowers on Valentine’s Day was not one of Arthur’s brightest ideas, however. It was the sort of thing Gwen might have sorted for him if he’d not forgotten the date, but as it was, he had to queue up with other desperate looking men in an over-crowded and over-heated florist’s shop while the florist and her assistants ran back and forth in a constant parade of fresh buckets of flowers and fillers. Fortunately for him, he wasn’t looking for traditional red roses, as they ran out two people ahead of him. Instead he asked for irises and yellow roses, and watched with a bit of amusement as a harassed-looking woman tossed them together into an arrangement and then into a box with practiced speed. He would have balked at the seventy quid price tag, but realized he was probably coming out ahead, given the last minute nature of it. So he merely handed over his card, thanked the woman politely and returned to the waiting car, where his driver Will glared daggers at him for the wait. Arthur thought that he might have made it despite the queue – he had left the office not terribly long after Guinevere – but for Will seeming to choose the most congested route possible.

Ah well. Nothing for it, Arthur thought to himself. He’d become far more accommodating towards things being outside the power of his control since Merlin had come into his life, and this was one of those things. Even if he took over the driving or navigation himself, it wouldn’t change the fact that traffic existed. Merlin texted at 8:05 asking where he was, and he responded, and then simply sat back and closed his eyes, breathing deeply and trying not to run back over the figures in his head again. It was hard, though. The further into his review he got, the less the figures made sense to him. Arthur sighed, and rubbed at his eyes. He needed to focus on Merlin right now, except that thinking of Merlin and his earlier text made Arthur think of Merlin in contexts that were neither relaxing nor appropriate for company. Shifting in his seat, he refocused to look out the window and watch the slow progress until the car pulled up in front of his building.

“Thank you, Will. We won’t need the car tonight, or tomorrow, if you’d like to take off,” Arthur said as he clambered out of the car. Will’s surly demeanour changed instantly and he grinned an insouciant grin at his employer.

“Cheers. Have fun this evening,” he said, slamming the door behind Arthur, who shook his head ruefully. Will wouldn’t have been his first choice for a driver, but Merlin loved chatting with him and had insisted that if they had to have a driver – which Merlin found ridiculously pretentious – it should be someone he liked, and so Will it was.

The building contained four flats in total, two of which were corporate owned and mostly vacant and the last of which housed their neighbor Gaius. Merlin and Gaius got on famously, though Arthur had had only a nodding acquaintance with him before Merlin moved in. They spent hours when Merlin wasn’t on call at the hospital puttering about the garden together, trading knowledge about herbs and tips on bringing tomatoes out in the city and poor English weather. The lights on the ground floor were out – Gaius was either already in bed or out for the night, and Arthur was vaguely pleased to know that he and his partner would be the only occupants of the building. No matter how well insulated or sound-proof the modern renovations were, Arthur found it difficult to fully relax knowing there were other people in close proximity to him. Merlin found it amusing, and frequently did his best to make Arthur yelp. In bed or out. As the elevator rose to their fourth floor home, Arthur found himself unable to conceal his smile. 

The door to their flat opened when the elevator doors closed behind him, and there stood his lover in the flesh, lean and lithe, happy smile crinkling his eyes into half-moons.

“Bout time, love,” he said. “I was afraid it would all get cold and inedible.”

“Sorry,” Arthur said, drinking in the sight of him before thrusting the box of flowers at him and kissing his cheek. “Queue was terrible, the drive was worse. I told Will we wouldn’t need him tonight or tomorrow just to stop him looking like he might strangle me for the wait and poor traffic.”

“Arthur Pendragon voluntarily taking the tube? Will wonders never cease?” Merlin said with a teasing lilt in his voice, shutting the door behind him. “What’re these for then?”

“Happy Valentine’s Day?” Arthur said with a shrug. “Nice to see you awake? Shag me, please?”

“Irises? And yellow roses?” Merlin asked, his tone delighted.

Arthur found himself blushing. “They match your eyes. And your smile, it’s like sunshine to me.” Impossibly, Merlin beamed even more brightly at him.

“This is very sweet of you, Arthur. Thank you. Don’t think I won’t remember you were late, but it’s sweet,” Merlin said. “I’ll put these in water, you go change and we’ll eat. Nothing fancy. Just pyjamas, yeah?”

Arthur felt again the body rush of affection, desire and anticipation wash through him, and he stopped loosening his tie to put a hand round the nape of Merlin’s long neck and draw him close, so that their foreheads were resting together.

“God, I’ve missed you,” he breathed, his lips finding Merlin’s for a fleeting kiss.

Merlin, in his turn, ran a hand up through Arthur’s golden hair, fingers scratching lightly at his scalp for a moment before responding. “I know, love. I’ve missed you as well. Now go. The food won’t get better for waiting.” 

Obediently Arthur headed towards the master bedroom, tugging his clothing loose along the way. He tossed the creased suit and button down into the hamper for dry cleaning, his undershirt, pants and socks into the washing hamper and hung his tie back on the rack, before donning a fresh white vest and pair of comfortable red plaid flannel pyjama bottoms. Merlin had filled a vase with the flowers and water, and was opening a bottle of red wine when Arthur returned. He admired Merlin’s bright blue jumper and the way his jeans showcased his arse, and gratefully accepted the glass of wine he was handed.

“All right with this, Arthur?” Merlin asked, placing his hands on his lover’s shoulders and searching his eyes. “I need to hear you say it.”

“With hugs and kisses, Merlin? Oh yes, please,” Arthur replied, taking a deliberate sip of wine to counter the feeling of his mouth suddenly going dry.

“All right then. I’m going to go over the rules again,” Merlin said and Arthur tried to not roll his eyes. Merlin did this every time they engaged in a scene, and Arthur knew the rules by heart. Still, Merlin insisted on clarity and on bracketing the scenes with a clear opening and closing, and while Arthur might have been tempted at times to blur the lines between their regular life and a scene, he knew that his desire for that was more fantasy than reality, so he nodded.

“One, we will use the color system. Green for ok or keep going, yellow for pause and talk, and red for hard stop. I will ignore anything you say outside those words. If I ask, you respond verbally with a color rating. Do you understand?” Merlin looked seriously at him, his blue eyes dark, his mien serious and his tone deliciously firm.

“I understand.”

“What color right now?”

“Green.”

“Very good. Two, I am in charge. You will follow my direction and my instructions at all times. Do you understand?”

“I understand, Merlin.” His impatience was making itself clear, but he tamped it down when Merlin raised an eyebrow.

“What color now?”

“Green.”

“Very good. Three, you can trust me to take care of you. I may push your limits, I may instruct you to do something you aren’t sure about. If you are concerned about my directions, what do you do?”

“I say ‘yellow’ and we pause and talk.”

“Yes. But you can trust me not to harm you, and to take care of you. You understand that?” Merlin cupped Arthur’s face in both hands, one thumb caressing his cheek, and Arthur leaned into it.

“Yes, damn it,” he breathed. “Please, Merlin, you have no idea. It’s been so long.”

“I know, love. I know. Last one. You know that unless you call red, this scene will continue until I decide you have had enough. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” Arthur whispered, closing his eyes, and turning his head to kiss Merlin’s thumb.

“Color?” Merlin asked with a low tone, resting his thumb on Arthur’s bottom lip.

“Green.”

“Then let’s begin,” he said, letting his hands fall to Arthur’s shoulders and squeezing them lightly. “First things first. Remind me, how late were you again?”

Arthur immediately groaned. He had hoped the flowers might offset his tardiness, but he hadn’t really expected it. “Twenty-four minutes.”

“Mmmm. Is it acceptable to keep me waiting on you?”

Arthur looked down at the wine in his hand and sighed. “No.”

“Especially when it’s been so long since we’ve been together,” Merlin said, his tone disapproving. “I think you need a reminder about manners, don’t you?”

“Yes,” Arthur said, already feeling the pricking engorgement stirring in his cock. 

“Take off my belt,” Merlin said, and Arthur had to gulp. Obediently, he set his wine down on the table and his hands moved towards Merlin, gliding onto his hips, fingertips slipping under the soft jumper and sliding across his lean body to the buckle on the thick, black leather belt. Biting his lip, Arthur unbuckled the belt while Merlin watched him, impassive, and drew it slowly through the loops on his jeans, before handing it to Merlin, a flip-flopping feeling of giddy dread in his stomach.

Merlin jerked his chin at the dining room table, where two places were set at one end, complete with candlelight dancing off the china. The other end was completely empty, chairs remaining against the wall. “Elbows on the table, arms flat, please.”

Arthur moved into position, the queer mix of excitement and shame undercut with lust, bringing a flush to his cheeks. He would never consider being this vulnerable with any person who was not Merlin, he reflected, as he waited tensely for Merlin to act.

“Right. Twenty-four minutes. Hmm. That would normally be twenty-four licks, and five more for tardiness generally. It’s quite rude to expect people to wait on you. It indicates that you don’t care for the time of others, that their time, their feelings aren’t as important as yours. Still, you did bring me flowers, lovely, gorgeous flowers that reminded you of me. Which means that you were thinking of me. Of what might make me happy, hmm?” Merlin paused, placing a hand on Arthur’s back. “Twenty licks total then, and you can keep your trousers on.” 

Arthur let out a breath. It was a fair warm-up, and he wasn’t about to complain. He felt the leather gently rest on his bottom briefly before hearing a crack and feeling a hot kiss of the leather and the stripe of pain that bloomed in the wake. He grunted, but otherwise kept silent. Merlin hadn’t asked him to count, and clearly wanted to move through this quickly, as the second and third licks hit before Arthur could have gathered himself to speak. Even though he was grateful for the protection his pants offered, it was thin at best, and Merlin had an unbelievably strong and unerringly accurate arm – when it came to this sort of activity at any rate. He remained hopeless when trying to wield anything related to sport. Arthur did his best not to squirm as the blows rained down, but was unable to hold back the grunts and whimpers towards the end, when the pain became an insistant burning, and tears filled his eyes. But it had been fast, and it couldn’t have been more than three or four minutes before he saw Merlin set his belt on the table where Arthur could see it and felt his hand assessing the warmth on Arthur’s arse. Merlin squeezed him gently, rubbing lightly at the throbbing, before kissing the nape of Arthur’s neck.

“Sit. I’ll bring dinner in,” he said, and Arthur did as he was told. He knew Merlin couldn’t see him, but he nevertheless didn’t rub at it, instead relishing in the grimace caused by the flare of pain that accompanied seating himself at the table. Already, he was riding the high of being outside his own head for awhile, the physical discomfort caused by the spanking, and the emotional vulnerability of placing himself at Merlin’s mercy and allowing it to happen, made it difficult to consider anything else.

“Here. Picked it up from Antonio’s on my way home,” Merlin said, setting a plate before Arthur, filled with Arthur’s favorite veal saltimbocca. He nearly drooled at the sight.

“God, you spoil me,” Arthur said, closing his eyes and enjoying the first bite. “What’d you get?”

“Salmon piccata,” Merlin said, swallowing his own bite. “But I’d think you’d rather hear what I got for dessert.”

“What’s that?” Arthur asked eagerly.

“I stopped by Gwaine’s,” Merlin said, grinning, by way of response.

Arthur groaned. “Oh god. You didn’t –“ The thought of the incredible patisseries that Gwaine produced in his bakery made Arthur’s mouth water. They were so sinfully rich that Arthur only rarely indulged in them.

“Yes, I did. But you’ll have to earn dessert if you want it,” Merlin said sternly. “Start by eating your food.”

Arthur shifted in his seat, and obediently devoted himself to eating, while Merlin was more leisurely, telling Arthur about his last few shifts, and his gratitude to be returning to days with Leon back in the country. He had received his CCT in O&G the year before and was still settling into being the senior specialist on the floor. Nights disrupted his flow, but if Arthur was honest, the best stories of his work came from the nights. Generally though, Arthur just enjoyed listening to him speak about it. It seemed an oddity for a gay man to specialize in obstetrics, but the magic that Merlin found in helping to bring children into the world, the miracles he saw in his work never failed to move Arthur. It was one of the things that Arthur loved about him. 

“Arthur,” Merlin said sharply, and Arthur realized he’d drifted into his own thoughts, simply looking at this man. “Eat, please.” His tone had gentled, and Arthur resumed his meal, and Merlin gave him a small smile. The meal was pleasant – good food, good wine, and easy company and Merlin continually keeping him present by virtue of his more humorous stories from work. Finally though, Arthur was merely pushing the remains about and squirming in his chair, surreptitiously hoping for dismissal, so they could move on the other parts of the evening Merlin had planned. The quick punishment before dinner had only whetted his appetite, and he couldn’t stem the overwhelming need for more. Merlin observed his partner, and rolled his eyes, and then motioned towards the doorway.

"Go wait for me in the lounge. You may kneel."

Arthur complied eagerly, moving to kneel in the middle of the lounge, relishing the renewal of the throbbing that had begun to wear away. There would probably be some bruising, hopefully more to come, and the delicious reminders of it as he moved through the next day or two would be welcome. Allowing Merlin to take complete control over his actions, allowing him to pull his mind free of the constant lists, worries and analysis and simply to drift in someone else's care for awhile was a drug he'd never imagined before Merlin appeared in his life. It was a break that he was profoundly grateful for, but it was also a trust and intimacy that he'd never experienced with any other person in his life and the depth of that was something that even after five years Arthur struggled to explain. It wasn't just sex, or a committed relationship - though those things were brilliant too - it was that through their coming together, through building their lives together and including this portion, Merlin had seen through all his barriers and slowly brought them all down until he could see Arthur's very soul shining through. He had touched him at his very core, reverently, lovingly, and Arthur had never imagined someone who could do that. These scenes were about that connection, and he craved them deeply.

But they were also about less mystical happenings, and Arthur had to admit that he was more than happy to have Merlin's unique ability to get him out of his own head at this precise moment. Because he needed to stop thinking about his company, and his uncle and the hemorraghing budget that he was becoming increasingly afraid was a sign of malfeasance and not simple mismanagement as he'd hope it would be. He a needed a break from the swirling thoughts in his head and the growing pit in his stomach. He needed someone else to come in and move his focus to something else, for someone else to take control, at least for a bit, to ease the burden that he alone carried. Nearly two thousand people were depending on him for their livelihoods, and even more - possibly millions - were dependent on the research that was conducted in his companies for so many medical conditions. He couldn't let them down, and the weight of that responsibility could wear on him, could make him obsess over the smallest detail, to micro-manage his employees and to disrupt the natural flow of creativity and work with a mania for control that had worsened the company's profile under his father's management. But it was so much to deal with, and if Merlin didn't provide that space for him to let it all go, to breathe, to simply be, Arthur thought he'd be in terrible shape. Merlin was his anchor stone, in so many ways.

And caught in his musing, he'd missed Merlin coming into the room, jumping when he felt the hand on his shoulder. Standing behind him, Merlin placed both hands on Arthur's shoulders and gently squeezed.

"My god man! You are so tense it's painful to touch you. Wish you'd said, I could have taken care of you sooner," Merlin sighed, and Arthur felt disappointed. "Never mind. We've both been busy and under stress. I'm here to care for you now. We'll start with a massage, I think. Clothes off. Lay face down on the sofa, arms at your side." Arthur complied. Merlin dimmed the lights so that the room was a darker, comforting shade. Then he put on some soft instrumental music that vaguely filled the background. "I've got some lavender and rosemary oil here that I'm going to use, yeah? What I want you to do, while I work some of this tension out of your back and shoulders is to empty your mind. Whatever it is that is weighing you down and worrying you - box it up, put it away. You are not to think of it again unless I tell you to. Do you understand?"

There was a deep breath, perilously close to a sigh, but Arthur clearly replied, "Yes, Merlin."

"If I catch you thinking of it again, you will be punished. Put it away, trust me and you will be rewarded. Do you understand?"

There was a catch in his breath this time, but Arthur responded, "Yes, Merlin."

"Color, please," Merlin said, though he had no doubt about this. Arthur knew he liked to check-in regularly, that he was conscious of safety practices. Working it in regularly made it less likely to take him out of the scene later.

"Green," Arthur said firmly. And then he could smell the herbal scents wafting over him as Merlin poured a bit of oil into his hands and warmed it up before softly sliding it onto Arthur's shoulders, then back. Merlin did not speak again, simply putting his knowledge of anatomy and his instruction from their trainer friend Percival to good use to work into the knotted, stiff muscles of Arthur's back. As Arthur grew more relaxed and lulled into the firm touches, which grew more purposeful as Merlin began to work the knots out of muscles between his shoulder blades, his mind began drifting. He imagined himself gathering up all the loose wandering threads of all his worries about the company and his uncle, rolling them up into a neat little ball, and shoving it away onto a shelf in his mind that he could close behind a door.

He felt himself relaxing into the space where nothing existed but this moment, and the next, where he opened himself to complete trust in his partner, and released himself from all responsibilities. Everything was simpler here, was direct, and despite what Merlin would sometimes come up with to push his boundaries or test his limits or challenge his endurance, it was always easy if Arthur allowed it to be - float away in the safety, exist, and do whatever Merlin asked of him. Even those things that he might not have agreed to in other situations, that he might not attempt again in future, even those were treasured memories. Under Merlin's guidance, Arthur had become more adept at patience, at humility, at reading others. He'd grown more open to new experiences and better able to shut away parts of his life at any given time, to enjoy where he presently was. That alone had radically increased his happiness, and eased his stress, and he needed that peacefulness now, now that Agravaine's shiftiness and numbers not adding to what they ought was weighing so heavily on him. He frowned, and sighed, and felt Merlin's fingers dig into the nape of his neck - not painfully, just warningly.

"I can feel you tensing up, just as I'd got you nice and pliant. Stop thinking, or I will make you think on something more immediate and less pleasant."

Arthur nodded gently, and the fingers resumed their more serious purpose. Arthur concentrated on his breathing, as he might in meditation, in and out in a rhythm of concentration and ease. He heard Merlin's murmured, "Better." but focused solely on his breathing. The only time he faltered in that was when Merlin's strong hands and sure fingers reached his reddened arse cheeks and he couldn't quite stop the sharper intake of breath, though whether it was actual pain, remembered pain, anticipated pain or simply lust would have left him too befuddled to answer. "Not yet, love," came the murmured response and Merlin move down the rest of his body, easing the tension from his quads and calves. Arthur nearly whined when the hands stilled, floating in the soporific state he'd been broken down into.

"I'm sure, love. But we've so much left to do tonight. I'm going to go get you water, and you're going to drink it, and then use the loo. Sit up while I do that, please. Do you need help?"

"No," Arthur groaned, stretching out and bringing his consciousness back into his body to direct its movement. Merlin chuckled, and pushed himself up and strode out of the lounge. Arthur blinked a couple of times and then used his arms to push himself upright, stretching again before swinging his legs to the ground, rolling his head on his neck and feeling loose and relaxed.

"Very good. Drink this please. Massage can release all sorts of things from your muscles. Water will help flush them out of your system. How're you feeling?" Merlin spoke quietly, though his tone was firm. Arthur had rarely seen Merlin in a clinical setting, having no need of an obstetrician or desire to cross potential boundaries into Merlin's workplace, but he assumed this tone was one his patients heard through their labors. Calm, in charge, firm but reassuring.

"Good, thanks. Very relaxed. A little sleepy." Arthur steadily sipped at the bottle Merlin provided him, not too quickly, but not wanting to delay them too much.

"Lovely. How's the light? Do you want to keep it dim or do you want more light?"

"Whatever you prefer," came the ready answer. "I'd like less."

"I think we'll keep it dim rather than a blindfold, at least for now. And the room temperature? Are you comfortable?"

Arthur wanted to laugh, a bit, at what felt like Merlin mother henning, but controlled the impulse and simply said he was comfortable. He finished his water, excused himself to use the loo and came back to find Merlin stripped of his jumper, and looking lovely and disheveled in just a vest and his belt-less jeans. 

"Very good. Now I'm going to bind you, arms now and later, ankles too," Merlin said, indicating the restraints he'd produced in Arthur's absence. Arthur nodded. "Hands behind your back, however is comfortable. Not too tight? Can you flex your hands and fingers? Good. Kneel. We're going to play a game."

Arthur knelt carefully, still adjusting to the restraints hugging his arms behind him. Merlin stood before him, smirking a bit.

"You have ten minutes to get my trousers and pants off and get me off without getting off your knees. If you manage it, you will be rewarded. If you don't, I'm afraid you will be punished."

Now Arthur was smirking. He did enjoy a challenge. He watched as Merlin set a timer on his phone and nodded at him to begin. Arthur immediately dove in with his mouth, teeth and tongue working to unbutton Merlin's jeans, dragging down the zipper carefully with his teeth, using his nose to edge the jeans away from his partner's hips before crawling around so that he could use his bound hands to tug the jeans down. He heard Merlin laughing, and quirked a smile himself, but didn't stop peeling away the clothes as best he could. Merlin obligingly stepped out once Arthur'd managed to tug the jeans down to his ankles, and Arthur wasted no time in using his teeth to drag Merlin's pants down and out of the way before applying himself to Merlin's cock like it was a treat he'd long been denied. He licked, and suckled, he took in as much length as he could, swirling his tongue, applying suction and pressure in turns. Arthur saw Merlin fisting his hands in an effort to maintain his composure and fend off the orgasm as long as possible, but in the end, Arthur grinned in triumph as he swallowed down the results of his hard work, with Merlin cursing under his breath as the timer chimed on his phone.

He offered Arthur some water, which Arthur took thankfully, and then Merlin smiled ruefully at him. "Fine, fine, you win that one."

"I thought we both won," Arthur said, smirking.

"Oooo, cheeky, are we? Sure that's the way you want to go when you are tied up and I'm the one in charge?" Merlin taunted, laughing. "Fine then, as promised, your reward is a choice for the next round. I'm going to bring out three implements, and you get to choose which I use."

Arthur groaned, his cock tightening in anticipation. Merlin knew that one of the things Arthur really loved, especially when stressed out by work, was impact play, especially when he was tied up. Then he was fully in Merlin's hands, and Merlin controlled his reality and focus. Whatever else he was feeling, the physical would intrude, and Arthur always felt it was something of a challenge to be pushed to see what he could take. There would come a point where he could not fight it, where he had to accept Merlin's authority over him, and he drifted in that space, wholly content, until Merlin brought him to a peak of pleasurable pain and mental release and then finished him off with some kind of sexual release, whatever he felt Arthur needed. It never failed to leave him sore, aching, and completely and utterly relaxed and calm and floating on a high of endorphins and love. He felt Merlin briefly cup the back of his head before pulling his briefs back up and he watched eagerly as Merlin left the room and returned with the promised offerings, which Merlin laid out before him on the coffee table. There was an inch-thick hardwood paddle that packed a hard sting, an eighteen-inch horsewhip with a burning three-inch tongue, and a new black suede flogger that made Arthur's mouth go dry.

"Thought you'd like that," Merlin said smugly. "And that is my Valentine's Day present to you, love."

"Yes, please," Arthur managed to say, the swooping of his stomach straight to his groin as he licked his lips and eyed the beautiful new piece.

"All right, but I want you to choose something else too. This isn't just for fun, you know. What else shall I use on you? What sort of attention do you need?"

"I don't-" Arthur stumbled over the question, and with a surge of desire, swallowed hard, "I just, um. I want, er, need. I need the paddle." He blushed as he said it, a tendril of embarrassment and shame creeping in as sometimes happened. Acquiescing was easier than asking, but Merlin understood that, and his reassuring, grounding touch was there on the back of Arthur’s neck, giving an approving squeeze. And Arthur relaxed again.

"As you wish. I think that I will warm you up with the flogger first. I think we'll need to move you though. Shall we relocate to the bedroom? I think I'd like to tie you up between the posts on the bed, with bright red silk rope. What do you think?" Merlin tapped his lip consideringly, as if Arthur was a piece of art that he was arranging to his satisfaction, as if he were asking for Arthur's input, rather than issuing direction and orders. Arthur could only nod his complete agreement.

Merlin guided him up to his feet with a hand under his elbow, and kept a hand on his back for reassurance as they moved into their bedroom. Merlin undid the cuffs that had held Arthur's arms behind his back, and disappeared from the room to retrieve the implements as Arthur rubbed his wrists and stretched his arms out to loosen them up and to rid himself of the excess energy and nerves that flared up as he faced down the imminent pain and pleasure awaiting him. Merlin returned and tossed the flogger and paddle onto the bed before Arthur and he nearly whimpered at the casual handling of them. Arthur shuddered to feel Merlin's lips on the nape of his neck, his hands gliding lightly over his arms and resting on his hips.

"Color?"

"Emerald green," Arthur breathed, to Merlin's chuckle.

"Hold onto the posts, please," came the order and then Merlin was removing bundles of red silk rope from their special drawers and quickly, expertly tying each of Arthur's limbs in turn, so that he was spread-eagled between the posts of their canopied bed, wrists and ankles embraced in the soft, taut bindings. "I'm going to warm you up, and I will decide how much you can take and at what strength. You know the words? Tell me again."

"Yellow to pause and talk, red to stop."

"Very good," Merlin said, squeezing Arthur's arse gently. The first kiss of the flogger was gentle on his shoulder, a mere touch, followed by another light touch that flicked the suede fall against him. The touches of the flogger remained light, ranging from caresses to light stinging that left him humming and feeling a bit warm. Gradually, as Merlin established a rhythm, the pressure he used increased, and became persistently stinging, warming his flesh, causing a flush across his entire body. Here, a stinging thud across his shoulders made him moan, and a sharper flick across one arse cheek made him clench, and always a growing warmth built into a low fire. The blows came without ceasing, harder each time, driving Arthur to whimper and groan and beg for more, his cock filling, pleasure and pain melding in his brain so that he anticipated every blow, feeling a persistently growing drive for more, for harder, for a touch to continue pushing him to a higher and higher peak. Four whistling swishes announced the hardest, most fiery impact directly to the spots where arse met thigh, where he could not fail to feel them whenever he sat for the next three days, and Arthur keened at the burning feeling, incapable of thinking of anything beyond the immediate heat flooding his body and the tension of being so hard and so desperate to be touched that he was leaking precum already. Merlin tossed the flogger aside and Arthur nearly sobbed when Merlin's hand closed around him, firmly but slowly stroking the length of him, making him tense with need.

"No, no, not yet my pet. It's not time just yet," Merlin crooned. "Come on, darling, you can wait."

"Not if you keep touching me, you clotpole," Arthur ground out, hissing at the immediate cessation of Merlin's touch, and taking a whimpering deep breath to try and regain his waning control.

"Oi, dollophead, maybe be more respectful to the man wielding the paddle next time," came Merlin's tart response before the hard, slapping thud resounded through Arthur, making him choke on groan. Three more followed in close succession, and Arthur cried out at each one, reveling in the harsh burn it produced before Merlin stopped. "Now then, let's try again, Arthur."

"Yes, sir," Arthur gasped, and Merlin's hand rested comfortingly on Arthur's arse.

"Who is in control here, Arthur?" Merlin asked, his voice firm and authoritative.

"You are,sir," Arthur replied immediately, and Merlin rewarded him with a soft caress and squeeze of his tender flesh.

"And what is the appropriate way to address me?" Merlin asked.

"Sir," came the breathless response.

"Mmmm. And who decides when you are allowed to come?" Merlin inquired.

"Y-you, sir," Arthur said, thrusting his arse backwards into Merlin's touch, at least as far as his bonds would allow, but the comfort of Merlin's hand cupping his reddened, swollen cheek immediately left at his pushing and Arthur whined in protest.

"You don't top from the bottom," Merlin snapped at him, and Arthur moaned.

"Yes sir, I'm sorry. Sorry, sir," he choked out, desperate for Merlin to touch him, whether it was caressing and soothing or hard and punishing. He was so bloody close to the edge, to being rocketed off into that euphoric space where he existed in the balance of pleasure and pain and surrendered all control into the hands of this man whom he loved without reservation, knowing he'd be held and loved and cared for in a way he probably didn't deserve save through this rite of willing submission to pain and was ready to beg, to plead, to sob for that final push.

Merlin knew him so well, he played his body like an instrument, and his free hand clamped hard around the nape of Arthur's neck, as his breath stuttered in his need. "Not quite yet, you aren't. But you will be. You will take whatever I give you, and you will ask for more." His breath was warm and damp as he spoke lowly into Arthur's ear. "I'm going to paddle you until you are cherry red and you won't be able to sit for a week, and you will thank me for it."

"Yes, sir," Arthur breathed, his voice hitching with desire. And then there was no warning as the paddle slammed into his arse with a loud slap, forcing a cry from his throat. There was a pause, until Arthur remembered. "Please sir, more."

Another resounding clap and burning, another whimper in his throat, and he rasped again, "Please sir, more." Two more licks, with no pause, and Arthur could feel the burning building, and he pleaded, "Please sire, more, please, god." Three more, another plea, four more hard licks and Arthur yelped with each one, his world narrowed only his wrists chafing against the clasp of the silk bindings, his fingers white-knuckled with their digging death grip on the posters, the warm, lingering spots of stinging on his back and shoulders from the flogger, and the fire throbbing in his swollen arse, and he begged, tears beginning to fall, and Merlin obliged with a volley of harsh blows that made Arthur sob incoherently, exultantly and he was so far out of his own head that he didn't register when the paddle clattered to the floor, and barely realized that Merlin was pressed firmly against him, encircling him. His arse burned against the rough cotton of Merlin's briefs, and the hardness they contained was like a hot brand against him, and he continued begging in hoarse, nonsensical whispers, as Merlin nipped at his neck, just below his ear, his shoulder; kissing and licking, and gentle nibbles, while one hand steadied him, splayed on his hip and the other - oh god, oh, god, oh god, Arthur was one giant being of tension and burning and need and there was a firm twist of the wrist and he exploded with a ragged cry and babbled thanks and gratitude while Merlin guided him through his release and gentled him as he breathed hard and fast, slumping within the clutch of his bonds, floating weightless, flooded with peace.

Carefully, Merlin loosed his legs from their restraints, and the first arm, which he slung around his shoulders to support Arthur while he undid the final tie. Arthur was relying heavily on Merlin's support, looking completely blissed out, high on the endorphins such activities always produced, tear tracks interrupted by his dopey, contented grin and attempts to sloppily kiss Merlin's impossibly sharp cheekbones. Merlin kept his chuckle to himself, helping Arthur slide onto the bed, helping him to settle comfortably on his front, arms folded under a pillow that his cheek rested on, lethargy making him slur his words into near meaningless mumbles of pleasure. Merlin was always very careful to help Arthur ride out the wave so that he enjoyed it and returned sated, rather crashing into a subdrop from hell. He kissed Arthur's cheek and shoulder, producing hefty sighs, glided his hands over the pink marks on his back, verifying that they were fading and needed only a soothing balm rather than real attention. There was already purpling on his arse, overlapping to show the outlines of where edges impacted his flesh with slightly more force, where the belt had kissed his flesh first. He gently slid his hands over, assessing the heat and the damage, softly touching his apology into the wounded flesh, though it was neither wanted nor needed. He began to pull away to get the soothing aloe gel and the arnica cream Arthur would need, but a whining sound stopped him.

"I will happily cuddle you all night, after I'm finished," he said, ruffling Arthur's golden hair. "We're done when I say we're done, love." Arthur groaned, but didn't otherwise protest as Merlin stepped away from the bed to find the unguents he was looking for, and to retrieve water and the gloriously sinful dessert he'd purchased. Arthur's eyes were less glazed over, and he was more capable of speech when he returned, though he didn't say much, simply sighed in contentment and let out pleased little moans as Merlin began massaging the healing creams into his abused flesh. The arnica would help to reduce the bruising, but he knew Arthur liked the reminders, liked fighting the pain, so he didn't worry over much. Once the cream was applied, Merlin helped Arthur roll onto his side, and prop up a bit so he was reclining like a king. He urged him to drink the water he'd brought, sip by sip, and he fed him bites of the gorgeous patisserie, all of which - touch, taste, sound, sugar and water - helped to restore Arthur to the present, physical world. He would probably still be feeling the relaxation from tonight for a day or two, but this gradual grounding helped Arthur to feel loved and cared for, and it was the best part to Merlin. To help break down the walls his lover built around himself, to pry them apart, to break his control and insist on his full trust, to piece him back together again - Merlin adored it. He didn't mind the other games, he found it sexy and fun, but it was this pure and shining belief that Merlin would hold him together and keep him well that made it worthwhile to Merlin, even when what Arthur wanted or needed verged into territory Merlin found uncomfortable. They made a good pair, the two of them.

Arthur was glowing with contentment, floating with happy release as he savored the luscious dessert bit by bit. He was too fuzzy and uncoordinated yet to feed himself, but he took advantage to kiss and lick at Merlin’s fingers with every bite proffered. Merlin had taken him down hard, gloriously so, and as satisfying as it had been, there was yet more he wanted, though he would not ask. Merlin would give or he wouldn’t, though his lingering hardness and his dark, stormy eyes gave Arthur hope. He kissed and touched whatever he could, pleading with him through his exhilarated daze.

Finally, finally, when Arthur had drunk all the water, the dessert was mere residue on the plate, and Arthur was peering hopefully at Merlin with less intoxicated languidity, Merlin gave in. Sliding down on his side, so that he could lie in a mirror image of Arthur, close, but not touching, his eyes crinkled into half-moons with his bright grin. One long-fingered hand came up to brush Arthur’s golden hair back, and cup his cheek.

“Hi there,” he whispered and Arthur laughed.

“Hello,” he said in response.

“How’re you feeling?” Merlin asked more seriously.

“Amazing,” came the response, followed by a more honest, “Also incredibly sore and thoroughly punished.”

“Again, maybe you should rethink calling people clotpoles when they have you tied up stark naked and hold a paddle in their hands,” Merlin said drily.

“I loved it. I needed it,” Arthur said quietly.

“I know,” Merlin returned softly. “We’re not entirely done yet. C’mere.” Merlin’s hand curled round his neck and tugged him gently forward so that their lips met, and tongues entwined, and they kissed deeply, with growing urgency. Merlin’s hands traced lightly over Arthur’s skin, making him gasp and moan as he flicked lightly at a nipple and moved to suck and nip at Arthur's neck.

"What do you want, love?" Merlin asked as Arthur returned his kisses with licks of his own down the column of Merlin's throat.

"Want you," Arthur growled. "Want you in me."

"Will you settle for fucking me? I don't want you to be too sore."

"Don't care, I like it," Arthur said, but Merlin pushed him back a bit to look at him.

"I know, darling, but that was a hard session. It will probably hurt."

"Please, sir, god, Merlin, please fuck me."

Merlin nodded and rolled away. "Alright then. On all fours so I can prepare you." 

It didn't take long for Merlin to locate the lube, to warm it up and begin gentle ministration to open Arthur quickly but carefully, maintaining a pleasurable touch, but with persistent stretching to relax and widen him. Holding his position was a challenge, when Arthur wanted to squirm, to push back onto Merlin's fingers, to hurry him along. Experience had taught him well that Merlin would not be hurried, and that Arthur's attempts to influence him were as likely to end the interaction as to encourage him. And after his earlier correction and his hesitation about fucking him at all, Arthur knew better than to press Merlin, as he expected Merlin would simply end their physical interaction for the night, and he wanted so much more.

He drifted, still riding the high from the earlier push into submission and surrender and his mind focused only on the sensations Merlin caused. It was nearly overwhelming, and when Merlin crooked his fingers at just the right spot, Arthur let out a ragged moan of utter need.

"Upright on your knees, please. Hold onto the headboard," Merlin instructed, and Arthur knew Merlin's own control was nearing a breaking point from the unsteadiness in his voice. "Lean forward just a bit more. Good. Color?"

"Green," Arthur breathed and then he felt the burning sting as Merlin pushed into him and oh merciful fuck it felt so good to be so filled. Arthur held the position Merlin had directed him into, hands gripping the headboard, arms taking the brunt of the impact to keep himself still as Merlin thrust up into him from behind trying to be careful of the injuries he had inflicted. He grunted with every thrust, drowning in the pleasurable sensation of intimacy and fullness, and the press of Merlin's lithe strength reigniting the pulsing warmth of his punished arse. He could hear Merlin panting behind him and the groan ripped from him as Arthur tensed around him, his own erection throbbing without any touch just from the angle of Merlin's penetration and he was swept away into a narrow constriction of being that was nothing other than a primal push and pull and thrust and grunt. There was bursting of pleasure and sparks behind his eyes and tension coiling low in his belly, tighter and sharper and a hand closed round his cock and he exploded. There was long blank moment of pleasure and another thrust from behind and it was a moment before Arthur realized the noise he was hearing was his own keening, and Merlin had him, was holding him, was supporting him and Arthur felt a sob tear through him, and without warning, he was crying. Intensely, completely without control, he collapsed into Merlin, tears streaming, chest heaving, and Merlin wrapped him tightly, crooking his chin over Arthur's shoulder, murmuring softly. One hand squeezed Arthur's waist, as if to ground him, and the other stroked up and down the opposite arm.

"Hey, love, hey now. I've got you. I'm here. It's all right, love. I've got you. Let it out. Just let it go." The words were soothing, and gradually, Arthur calmed. Tears continued to flow, but he seemed to regain control over his emotion and his breathing and settle. Merlin continued his gentle stroking and placed light kisses on his neck and shoulder while he held him close. When Arthur sighed and finally moved to wipe his eyes with the back of his hand, Merlin finally released him, turning his face towards him. "Love? You all right there?"

Arthur nodded and gave him a tiny, watery smile. "Sorry, I think I needed that more than I realized."

Merlin ran a hand over Arthur's hair, his hand coming to rest cupping the back of Arthur's neck. "Never apologize for that. I'm here when you need to break down. Lay down, darling, I'm going to go get a warm washcloth and more water and then you'll snuggle up with me if you like and we'll talk about it, yeah?" Arthur nodded, and accepted the tissue that Merlin handed him to blow his nose.

In the bathroom, Merlin cleaned himself up, and returned to the bedroom with a warm cloth and cleaned Arthur up. He gave Arthur another bottle of water and retrieved fresh boxer briefs for both of them, before turning down the duvet and moving Arthur into a semi-spooned position. Arthur huffed contentedly, and Merlin carded his fingers through his hair as he thought about Arthur's crying jag. It wasn't the first time such a thing had happened during or after their play, and Merlin had taken Arthur hard down hard. The tension he'd felt in him, the fatigue, the drifting into worry he'd seen made Merlin think it was merely the result of too much tension being held and needing release, but it was his responsibility not to assume, so however content Arthur seemed now, Merlin needed to know.

"Tell me what happened, love."

"It wasn't you," Arthur said immediately, and Merlin was a little relieved. Their early time together had required a lot of managed discussion between them to draw Arthur out and make him open up about what they were doing and how it made him feel. That he knew what Merlin was asking was simply another sign of how far they'd come.

"Ok, thanks for that. But tell me," he coaxed.

"It's work. Well, that and we've not seen each other for weeks, so that too. But you were perfect. Exactly what I wanted and needed. I needed that, to get it out of my system so I can think about this all logically." Arthur sighed, and Merlin waited patiently. "R&D is bleeding money. And have been for awhile. I knew something was off last quarter, but Agravaine had a perfectly reasonable explanation about the delays in the research after the human study yielded conflicting information, and of course, costs of some materials have risen with the volatility of the markets thanks to Brexit and whatever the bloody Americans are doing with China. I mightn't have been too worried, but for two things that happened."

"What was that?"

"First, is that after last quarter, I decided to begin looking further into things and trying to project this quarter so I could prepare a realistic assessment for the board meeting and we could decide what was worth pursuing and what wasn't. It's not a decision I'd like to make my own. The numbers didn't add up. Of course projections can be wonky, but the further I dug, the more inconsistencies I found. I might have even brushed that aside were it not for a meeting I had last week with Annis Caerleon. We'd bumped into each other getting coffee and she'd commented how frustrating it was to be facing budget cuts when they'd demonstrated such good results on her team and wanted to know if I was thinking of lay-offs so she could prepare her people."

Merlin frowned. "Even if R&D isn't doing well, the company as a whole is doing well enough that you're not facing redundancies, are you?"

"That's exactly the point, Merlin. We are meeting shareholder expectations. I'm sure there are plenty of shareholders and even board members who would prefer we were more profit driven, but we have a margin built into the budget for research to cover quite a bit. We'd have to be in serious jeopardy to consider redundancies and even though there is an issue here somewhere, we're nowhere near that.

“Which means someone has been telling Annis something different.”

“Right. And the only one who’d do so that she would take seriously would be Agravaine,” Arthur said. He looked defeated. “I’d hoped it was all just confusions and misunderstandings cobbled from by the by conversations or something, but add it all up and, well.”

“Oh, Arthur, I’m so sorry,” Merlin said, squeezing him tightly, burying his nose comfortingly in Arthur’s hair. He felt Arthur’s shrug. “What will you do now?”

“Quietly let the board know we have concerns about possible malfeasance and bring in a forensic accountant, I expect. I’ve probably let it go too long already trying to figure it out myself, but –“

“But it’s family. Darling, I wish you’d said. You shouldn’t have to go through that stress on your own.”

“Merlin,” Arthur said in a strained half-laugh. “I’m not alone. It’s just shit timing, that’s all. Besides, I’m hardly going to ask you to call off work because I want a thrashing to take my mind off, am I?”

He heard a snorting laugh behind him and felt Merlin’s entire body shaking. “Can you imagine? Sorry Mrs. Nobody, but my partner needs a topping, can you hold the baby in for a bit more? Couple hours should be fine unless he's been a very bad boy.”

Arthur started chuckling, and then they were both laughing so hard that tears sprang to their eyes and they laughed until their sides ached. Seeing each other reduced to such helpless mirth only egged them on more until they hurt too much, and finally settled again, smiles on their faces. Arthur reached up and held Merlin's face in his hands, placing a sweet kiss on his nose.

"Thank you, darling man. You are the best, most amazing partner in the world, and I adore you."

Merlin's eyes crinkled into half-moons with his grin. "You're all right, I s'pose. Dollophead."

"Turnipbrain."

"Cabbagehead."

"Peabrain."

"Prat."

"Wanker."

"Oi, stuff it. I'm turning off the lights, and you are going to sleep. We've both got work tomorrow, you know."

"Always so bossy," Arthur huffed, as Merlin turned off the lights and carefully rearranged them into a comfortable bundle of limbs.

"Yep. Part of why you love me. Now sleep. I'll cook you breakfast in the morning, doll." So Arthur did as he was told, secure in Merlin's deceptively strong arms.

~XOXO~


End file.
